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Initially, all six contestants have a group date in which they all sit at a table in the dark room exchanging names and getting to know one another's voices and personality types. The contestants enter the dark room for the final time and are revealed to each other one at a time.

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Because, you see, Dating in the Dark is awful. For those of you who missed it first time around, which will be most of you because there were birdhouse webcams that got higher ratings, let me explain how Dating in the Dark worked. Five years after it vanished in a fartcloud of public disinterest, Dating in the Dark is back. Alamy This feels like a weird thing to say, but Dating in the Dark is back this week. You see, how to prepare yourself for a hookup Dating in the Dark isn't really a dating show at all.

It's horrible, a show that you can only really view through the gaps in your fingers. Can Jeremy put a drumstick in his mouth and run to the other side of the room without tripping up and tearing a hole in his soft palate? Metaphorically speaking, at least.

The contestants were mostly an unattractive mix of cocky and needy. And this is going to be on television. Needless to say, I'll be watching again. How on earth was this allowed to happen?

The contestant will go to the balcony and wait for his or her prospective partner to join him or her. It achieves this by pairing up a model-grade contestant whose attractiveness is constantly alluded to with a more normal-looking counterpart. Cameras are set up to show both the meeting balcony and the front door. There were some awful men and some awful women put up in a mansion. Why anyone would bother with unconvincing displays of affection when they could watch a procession of people hurt themselves is beyond me.

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That's what happened to Claire, and seeing her get rejected for what appeared to be the millionth time was heartbreaking. After the one-on-one dates, each contestant can choose to invite another that they wish to see. They would date each other, but only in total blackness. What if they bring back Sing Date next?

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The foul resurrection of Dating in the Dark

During the reveal process the couple must remain silent. In practise, though, it was dismal. In fact, that's an understatement.

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